On January 19, 2023, Erin and Elliot were walking in Oshman City. Suddenly, a bright light appeared in the night sky. It was a call for help. They embarked on an epic journey to create the battiest, rattiest, fattiest box of all time.
Preparing to Create the BATBOX
In order to create the BATBOX, they first needed to gather their bat materials. They stalked Oshman City and hunted down:
- nine 14.5” long pieces of 1×4 bat lumber
- six 12” long pieces of 1×4 rat lumber
- four 10” long pieces of 2×2 fat lumber
To acquire these materials, they found long planks of wood and measured the right dimensions. However, to account for the kerf of the blade and any unlikely errors, they added a 0.25” buffer, cut the wood, and then sanded the wood to the exact lengths.
Assembling the BATBOX
Then, they started assembling. Erin and Elliot had a vision. It was to make handles, but not just any handles: BAT handles. They sketched the outline of a bat. They measured their hands. And finally, they drilled. They made four perfect semicircles, the most ergonomic shape for one’s hands to hold.
Next, they had to drill the frames of the box. Using the corner clamp, they lined up the planks, measured the correct distances, and marked where the screws should go so they don’t hit each other. In order to minimize chipping, they first drilled a pilot hole, countersink, and then drilled the screws in.
Three frames later, they were done. However, one of the frames was different from the others. It was the bottom frame, so they added planks on the bottom.
The box looked a little too sharp, so they decided to route the edges. They routed the edges. Then, it was almost time to put everything together, but there was a problem. The wood was still raw af. They took power sanders and sanded every single surface and edge of all of the frames so that no one in Oshman City would have to touch rough wood with their soft hands.
Finally, they put in the support beams. To ensure the spacing was consistent, they put planks and foam sheets between the frames. Then, they drilled it all together. Hooray!
Post Processing the BATBOX
First, they had to sand it all together one last time so the stain would stain.
The deep black stain masked the wood with a mysterious matte vibe. Then, to mark the BATBOX with the Bat symbol, they cut vinyl stickers to use as outlines while spray painting. They then applied the stickers above the handles and pressed down the edges tightly. They sprayed around the sticker using a Bat yellow spray paint. After drying, the sticker was removed.
Finally, they had one more step: matte clear polyurethane spray.
Then, it was finished. Oshman City would survive one more day.
If I were to do this project again, one thing that I would do differently is to drill slower and look at the wood to see if there are any weak points so you can drill and route the right edges to make the crate look nicer and be more stable. While assembling the box, there was a slight mishap where the wood cracked where there was a knot in the wood, as pictured below.
To fix this, we first removed the screw and relocated it slightly under the crack. Then, we closed up the gap as much as we could by adding a small screw through the crack. It wasn’t perfect, but after the post-processing process the mishap was covered up quite well.
Cost of the BATBOX
- 1×4 Wood: 17.2 feet x $3/8 feet = $6.45
- 2×2 Wood: 3.42 feet x $3/8 feet = $1.28
- Wood Screws: 1/4 box x $10/box = $2.50
- Wood Stain: $7.47/can = $7.47
- Spray Paint: $6.48/can = $6.48
- Clear Polyurethane: $14.79/can = $14.79
- Labor: 8 hours x $15 = $120
TOTAL: $158.97
